So far the winner goes to the lovely Keri whose darling Terry got her this little beauty one Christmas:
Doesn't that just make your heart beat a little bit faster?
In case Keri wasn't sure what exactly it was she had eagerly torn the wrapping paper from (and let's be honest - I haven't got a clue), Terry had enclosed an explanatory poem.
To be fair - a LOT of effort has gone into this - parts of it even rhyme. Do you think the 300 'kisses' were a subconscious reflection of Terry's concern that the gift may not be well received?
Inspired. Utterly inspired. I particularly love the line 'now it didn't cost as much as you think' - just in case Keri was too overwhelmed by this particular piece of I.T kit and wanted to exchange it for something else. Like a new mouse. Or a pen drive.
It's beautiful Terry. It brings a tear to my eye. Who said romance is dead?
HOWEVER - males reading this and wishing to appeal to potential mates might want to note that I.T hardware is not normally the route to go down when it comes to wanting to encourage women to jump into bed with you. The same can be said for car parts and/or any kind of Sci-Fi memorabilia. There are of course exceptions (just in case any of you are dating a woman with a Yoda fetish and fondness for alloy-wheel trims).
If you wish to add your list of gripes to the Big Pants Present Bonanza - then please, drop me a line and I shall immortalise your ingratitude into cyber space.
That includes you mum and dad for the Forest Green Men's towelling dressing gown you bought me as my main present for my 18th.
My EIGHTEENTH. Everyone else was getting bracelets or cars or whatever and I got something modelled by a man over 50 wearing slippers. What kind of message is that sending out to a young girl at the dawn of adulthood? And it wasn't even accompanied by a poem!
It was a warm dressing gown though - especially when it caught fire during an unfortunate fish finger grilling accident at Uni..... but that's a whole other blog post....