Friday, 6 March 2009

For Your Eyes Only

I have some advice for you, based upon:

a) bitter experience


b) my acute powers of observation (albeit several hours too late).

THIS is a bottle of Clinique's excellent make-up remover 'Take the Day Off' which is for (quote) 'lips, lashes and lids':

THIS on the other hand is a bottle of Lactulose. A syrupy medicinal substance based around fruit sugars which is suitable for treating constipation in small children:

Unless you enjoy having your eyes glued shut and spending far too much time removing ingrained bits of cotton wool from your eyelashes, I wholeheartedly DO NOT recommend you confuse the two.

My eyes! My eyes!

As for 'Take the Day Off!'s' properties as a laxative, I couldn't possibly comment.


  1. Nooooooooo! Oh god I SO thought you were going to say you'd given the Clinique to one of the boys to 'get them moving'!!! Sorry, as bad as sticky eyes probably are, the alternative has GOT to be worse!!!! I feel slightly queasy just thinking about it.


    I shouldn't last. I came in drunk once and removed my eye make up with nail varnish remover. Hell that hurt...