Anyway the conversation went something like this:
Father: Thank you for my birthday card (his birthday was actually yesterday - apparently there are postal strikes, convenient really when you forget to post a card.....).
Daughter: No worries! Glad you liked it.
Father: Well at least I THINK it's from you.
Father: Well I've received a card with a puffin on the front, a rather fat puffin, and I presume it's from you.
Father: It's entirely blank.
Father: Yes it's addressed to me but when I open the card there's nothing inside it. Nothing at all.
Daughter: Oh. My. God
Father: I thought your mother was the one with the brain addled by drink. I mean I presume you did actually intend to, at the very least, sign it?
Daughter: Oh. My. God. There were so many birthday's last week (not to mention my own and one of my sons) but I DEFINITELY remember writing you a message.
Father: Well the card is blank.
Daughter: Well the message is somewhere because I remember writing it.
Oh. My. God. One of my friend's children must have a card with the unforgettable words 'To my father, stay off the scrumpy!' inscribed inside it.
Father: (turning to my mother) She's sent one of her friend's children a card with a message to me written inside it. About scrumpy.
Mother: Tell her not to worry. It's a jolly nice card and I've got an envelope that will fit so, as she's left it blank, I'll get to reuse it! I like puffins.....
Daughter: I'll expect to see it again next August then......
The next question I have is - what else have I done (or not done)?